Behind that Smile

I have been thinking about a lot of things lately. I have been writing poetry and other sort of crap but I know some people wouldn't mind reading them or perceiving anything about it. I know there will be a few and not too many people will understand that every person that you see each day, the one you are making an eye to eye contact in the subway or on the street have been fighting for their own desperate battles. 

Now, I understand Filipinos have the happy-go-lucky persona. We laugh out our problems and we even resort to drinking alcohol, going to a sing-along performance at videoke bars or go have some foodtrips with friends. 

It is the untraceable "perfect smile" that we put on ourselves that hides all the pain and the disappointments that we have inside. 

BUT how about after all those laughters? How about after taking off the mask of that perfectly beautiful smile? How about if you want to talk to a specific person and he/she is not available for you? How do you usually unload something that others will understand every single feeling that has been bothering you and you yourself cannot even exactly comprehend. These are some questions that most people with depression will ask themselves and instead of telling their closest friends or families about what they are going through, they resort to just laugh it off or smile in every "how are you" questions you throw at them. 

Most of the people who have depression will try to hide what's going on with them because for one great reason, the fear of being misunderstood. Most people always relate their own problems with others, which is not totally applicable in most cases. You don't actually need to advice depressed people unless they wanted to. All they actually need is a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on. 

Now, how do you react if a person comes to you and says, he/she wants to die. Please don't laugh about it as if the person who confided to you is just joking around (regardless if it's a half meant joke) because it takes a lot of guts for a depressed person to say that to another human being. Instead of reacting on it as a ridiculous thing, try to listen instead of why that person wanted to commit suicide. No matter how small the reason of his intention to commit the act never judge instead, let the person know that you care and that you don't want to lose his life because it is important to you. 

When a person message you out of nowhere, please don't ignore (unless if that person turn out to be a stalker or a criminal) because maybe that person needed someone to talk to at that moment in time and it might be that you are the saving graces for that person's down moments. Again, try to listen with less judgment but with more compassion. 

Bottom line is, be sensitive to every person that you meet each day. Like you (or if not), they also carry a heavy load in their heart and mind. Sometimes, it only takes another smile from you to lighten up their mood or it takes a little friendly conversation to let them realize that they matter to live one more day in the uncertainty of this vast universe. 

12/15/2015 at 7:15pm | MTA © 

This article also appeared in Rappler X blogsite.